I simultaneously feel “finished” having kids and want 10 more. A big factor there is pregnancy. I’m not a fan.
Once it’s over and the birth/breastfeeding/happy/love/bonding hormones are flowing, pregnancy seems like a distant memory. It feels like this new baby was always part of the family and my life, and it’s impossible to imagine any alternate reality.
But during pregnancy? It’s long. And for me, not the most awesome (other than a few blissfully perfect weeks in the second trimester).
You know how when you have a cold and you’re congested and your nose is all raw and your lips are chapped from mouth-breathing and you can’t remember what it felt like to breathe effortlessly? You shout things like, “I’LL NEVER TAKE BREATHING FOR GRANTED AGAIN!” and you mean it with every ounce of your being?
It’s kind of like that. My first trimester of each pregnancy (actually more like the first half of the entire pregnancy) was like a lingering flu. I was exhausted beyond belief, I was nauseated, very little food was appetizing to me…but I constantly told myself that any time now it would get better.
Around 20 to 22 weeks, it really did. I felt like a normal person, I could start eating food again, and the muffin top turned into a cute baby belly. But just a few weeks later, the third trimester sets in and I get tired again. Muscles and joints feel worn out, and the cute baby belly starts feeling really heavy. My shoulders, neck, and back hurt, and after a while there’s no room for everything in my body. Reflux starts, and it’s hard to sleep. It’s impossible to sleep comfortably. And it drags…on…and on.
I’m so glad I wasn’t pregnant with Joseph as long as I was with Anneliese.
Pregnancy? I’m not a fan.
But knowing that a baby will be joining our family, knowing that a personality is brewing in a tiny fetus, knowing that my existing children will soon have another sibling to grow up with and to have as an inseparable partner in life…that’s so cool. And I like how my mom put it: “I just kept wondering WHO else was in there!” Me too.
We could stop and not have any more kids, ever. But I’d always wonder what it would be like if we had one more, and who that one more would turn out to be. But if we have one more, I know I’d wonder about another. And another.
WHO ELSE IS IN THERE???
But man…pregnancy, y’all.
It’s not the worst thing ever, but it’s kind of like having a cold for almost a year. I forget what it feels like to be normal, to be comfortable.
But not being pregnant? I’ll never forget the butterfly flutters early on and the kicks and rolling later.
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14 Comments
I’m at that stage now of wondering what another would bring to our family. I had two girls practically back to back, their fifteen moths apart. By the time one started sleeping thru the night and I was starting to feel “normal” again, the first trimester hit with the second. When they were both “little” newborn/toddler, infant/toddler I was sure we were done. I couldn’t imagine spreading my time to make sure all three felt secure and loved properly. Now that I’m up to a big toddler/little toddler…the thinking has begun. Then, the logical thinker in me comes out, we like to travel with the girls, take them places, and experience new things, I want them to attend private school, and my husband and I are onto paying off our mortgage in our Ramsey steps. I think our family is complete…I think
Sigh… You know the issues I have with pregnancy. I’m almost certain to have preterm labor again. And geez, the puking. But alas, I am not done having babies. I do dread it though
We’ve been wrestling with whether or not to have a third. It hurts to think of not having another and yet I do feel complete with my two boys!
Oh pregnancy was hard for me. I was sick the entire 9 months. The only time I didn’t get sick was the morning I went into labor. I would love more children, but I don’t think I can go through 9 months of morning sickness (more like all day sickness) again. However, adopting is something my husband and I are considering!!
I know you’ve done a series on gdiapers (gpants) already, but I’d like to know what you think now that you have 2 children. Are you using Anneliese’s old Gdiapers for Joey?
Yep. I’m due with baby #8 next month and every time I’m pregnant I hope for twins because, as I tell people, “I love the kids but I’m not a fan of the pregnancy, and two for one sounds like a great deal.” Every pregnancy we plan on stopping, and afterwards I can’t give up the hope of another blessing. Sitting here with dreadful heartburn and aching hips I’m thinking, “Maybe this will finally be my last…” lol
Heya! I realize this is sort of off-topic however I had to ask. Does running a well-established website like yours take a lot of work? I’m completely new to operating a blog but I do write in my journal daily. I’d like to start a blog so I will be able to share my own experience and views online. Please let me know if you have any suggestions or tips for new aspiring bloggers. Thankyou!
Such a great post! So many bloggers seen so happy throughout their pregnancy, which leaves me wondering why I was so miserable pregnant. It is hard, and for some they simply never enjoy the experience. I know there will be more pregnancies for me, and I optimistically hope that I can be a glowing, happy pregnant woman. However, I don’t know if it is in my cards.
I think I’ll always wonder too- what would another baby do for our family? How would the dynamics change? Should we? Shouldn’t we?
But then I think about being pregnant. I LOVE being pregnant. It’s got to be my hormones. Yes, I’m uncomfortable and nauseous and achy, but I feel GOOD. I think my body/hormones are overpowering my logical mind and trying to get me to repopulate the earth all by myself.
I had a very easy pregnancy with my daughter. No morning sickness, food aversions, reflux, etc. I did get some swelling which was annoying but I’d do it again. My husband is happy with just one child (sigh) so we may not have another. She’s only 6 months though, so we’ll see if things change later on.
I had a very easy pregnancy with my daughter. No morning sickness or food aversions. I did have some swelling which was annoying but I could do that again. My husband is fine with just 1 (sigh) so we may not have another. She’s only 6 months, so we’ll see if things change later on.
I love this post because I can relate! I’m sick as a dog during pregnancy….and well, being a Navy wife, my kids depend on me so much and I want to be their rock…I’d rather not have that nine months of having a fraction of my energy left to be an awesome mom. But now that Gracie is 2.5 I feel really ready to face it again. I know that the girls will have to be without supermom for a bit but oh I would so love to have another child to add to our joy. I think we will be trying for #3 very very soon! 😉
I feel the same way. I look at Frankie and can’t imagine not having babies forever. It’s like they were always here. But I find pregnancy so hard. I enjoyed being pregnant, but had gestational diabetes with Mille and Frankie and was just exhausted the entire pregnancy. I would have 10 more still, my husband on the other hand is happy with 3 so no more 🙂
I’m the same. Pregnancy is not good to or for me. I have dreadful nausea and sickness until well into the 2nd trimester, 32 weeks this last time, I had very painful SPD last time, and false labor from 36 weeks. Yet, we’d like a 3rd. I’m almost ready to face it all again, my son is 2, we’ll TTC some stime this autumn. Knowing I would have a baby made it worth it and got my through, but we’ll be done after 3! 🙂